Doushite?

Sunday, November 30, 2008

I know it's kinda late; @ 6:30 AM

Sorry people for not posting for a very long time. My computer's been down and oh, life is just crazy!

Well, the last day of school has been a long time ago as it feels and seems. And umm, I really miss my friends and teachers.

I've been planning to go out with Fatin and Nazira but seems like my mum isn't consenting very much on me merayap-ing(as she calls it). So, yeah. I just have to be patient I guess.

Mmhmm. So I'm going for holiday soon and umm staying at home for the past two weeks have not been really pleasant to tell you the truth. Considering that the only source of entertainment I got is the TV and the computer and I'm sure you all know that even TV gets knda boring after a while. So hmm, yeah. Life has been a torture.

So hmm, Nazira just came back from Cambodia and she bought me some stuffs which I am yet to collect from her. Although I said not to buy me anything she did and so you get how hard headed she can be. Oh nazira you know I love you :D

So yeah. The reason why my blog has been personalised is that I found out my bro has been reading it(!!!). He even has my blog link under his favourites. But I guess he does that because he loves me(bleah) although so, I still do appreciate a little privacy, thanks.

And it freaks me out to know that he knows who I like(like duh he reads my blog) and I'm just uncomfortable about it. But I know who he is 'dating' and I'm sure he needs some privacy too so I'll keep my mouth shut.

And thus, since I have my computer back in my hands, I'll try and update more on my very boring daily life to you and in the meantime, if anyone has anything fun to do, do let me know okay? I'll really appreciate it.

Labels: bored, friends, love, random

aktf;
♥

Thursday, November 13, 2008

@ 7:45 PM

Hey peeps! I'm so missing my friends right now I just feel dreadful! Oh I just can't wait for tomorrow so I can meet them again! Must go out catch a movie or something okay guys! ):

But anyway, I had the best day yesterday. Here's why:

In the hall, some people from Fuhua Secondary came over for a talk but the mic wasn't working and well, my class had to leave for West Coast Park at 8am. So while they were fixing the technical problem, the lights in the hall went out. Baik uh. So then we got the chance to escape the maybe one hour talk to go for our class outing. What a great way to start the day right? Tell me about it.

So then the bus driver was late and Sudha was swearing about the lateness of the bus driver. Hah. Sudha, Sudha. And you're calling me crazy. Tsk.

A while later we were on the bus listening to my iPod(yes, I brought it along!) on the way to West Coast Park. We reached there in a while and it was mmm, drizzling. So we decided to have our free breakfast(paid by the teachers) first and hoping that it would get very hot so it would you know, dry up the whole place. But it didn't lah ofcourse. But it did momentarily stop raining when we finished our breakfast and wanted to head to play at the flying fox(eh gerek seh!).

At the flying fox, me and Sudha were joined by the boys(Iskandar, Xavier, Jon, Ryan, Moses, Max and Daryl) and so we took turns to push each other to the other side of the flying fox. And when you know, we each got stuck in the center, there's always help and you know, ground saviors. (:

So then I always got stuck stuck in the center(I don't know why!) and the guys had to always either push me forward or backward or I drop down from the flying fox. ><"

So then we challenged each other to the obstacle course or in other words the rope course. It was so fun! I got dity but heck cares 'cause it was going to be the last time I was ever going to wear that P5 Leadership Camp T-shirt anyways. So yeah. It was kinda dirty. KINDA.

So then started to drizzle again and we started to head to the shelter and I suggested to take a jumpshot with some of the girls there. A lot of them were well, unsuccesful. Heh.

So presenting the FAIL gallery:

I love Sudha's expression. Haha. And Chanel looks like the Hunchback of NotreDam! Haha. No offence Chanel. You know I love you. Heh.

Sudha: I look like as if I am standing ON them!

And Chanel, again with the hunchback. But I guess that would be the position you would be in before you jump heh.

Haha. I don't know what was trying to do but my guess, JUMP!

Haha. I just can't stop laughing at this picture because if the position I was in. Haha.

Okay this picture is a LOL. I was kinda like in an 'oh thank god I'm safe' position and Sudha was in like a 'kiss me baby' position. RIGHT?! I mean look at her expression! MAMPOS!

Damn. What's with my expression sia?

Timing FAIL.

OMG! I was like trying to expose more of my thighs right? Ew god. And mmhmm. Nicole that is just cool. Haha.

So now I present to you the only picture that WAS succesful.

So High School Musical right? And the picture is taken by yours truly. Heh. And these are the few people who are loved by ME.

Nicole Ng. She's the best girlfriend ever.

And to my best friend Sudha, thanks for tolerating me eventhough I do act like a bitch in class at times. And thanks for the laughs and company throughout this whole one year. I love being your partner and it has been a pleasure for me to be able to do so. Love you dearies!

I'll most probably take more pictures of the people whom I love this Sat and post it up.

And Zahirul, look forward to meeting you on Satuday. We shall camwhore okay!

aktf;
♥

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

@ 2:01 AM

I am pissed!

And believe it or not, it was my BEST FRIEND who pissed me off! And I can't believe I cried telling my brother about it.

So this was what I was pissed about.

Last night. On the phone
Nazira: Why you so glum today?
Me: Hmm? Nah. Its nothing you should know about.
Nazira: Eh tell me.
Me: I told you already. Its nothing you should know about.
Nazira: Tsk Ain just tell me lar.
Me: No. I can't.
Nazira: Tell me Ain!
Me: I'll tell you when the time comes.
Nazira: Yeah sure. And that would be like never.
Me: Maybe.
Nazira: Tell me tomorrow in school uh.
Me: hmm, MAYBE I'll tell you.
Nazira: Okay. then you wait outside 6E clasroom.
Me: Uhh, I am going there.
Nazira: Okay then 6B?
Me: Oh no thanks.
Nazira: Lazy bum!

So that was the conversation we had on the phone last night. So then today in the canteen during recess, she asked me.

Nazira: So why you glum yesterday?
Me: Hmm, somehow, I don't think I should tell you about it.
Nazira: But you said that you would tell me.
Me: Yeah. That I did. But I did not promise that I would.
Nazira: Tsk. Just tell me will you?
Me: No. I told you already. I don't think you should know about it.
Sudha: -whispers to me- Is it about the *thing*?
Me: Yes.
Nazira: How come she knows aboutit and I can't know about it?
Me: Because she tells me everything so I tell her everything. You don't tell me everything, so why should I?
Nazira: Tsk. Just tell me lar.
Me: No I can't tell you.
Nazira: What is it about?
Me: Its about Iskandar.
Nazira: I know its about him. But what hppened? You guys fought?
Me: Errr, yeah.
Nazira: About what?
Me: Nothing you should know about.
Nazira: Tsk. You better tell me before I curse both of you to become cursed pigs!

Okay pause. I was shocked she said that. Of all things that came out of her mouth, she jst had to say cursed pig or 'babi sial' in Malay. I was really hurt when she said that to us, her BFFs. Okay then...

Me: - just stared straight ahead and hook my head-
Nazira: -sudden outburst- FINE! I DON'T WANT TO BE YOUR SISTERS ANYMORE. YOU GUYS CAN GO MARRY FCUKING GHOSTS! CAN GO TO HELL AND CRY YOUR EYES OUT 'CAUSE I DON'T CARE. I CURSE YOU BECOME PIGS AND YOU GUYS CAN GO TO HELL!
Me: Oh no. We won't be the ones going to hell, you would be the one going there 'cause you cursed us when we did nothing wrong.
Nazira: -stood up and leave-
Me: Why is she angry at me for not telling her a simple secret?
Suha: Yeah man. Some secrets are just meant to be kept secret.
Me: Yeah seh. I mean when she has problems and I ask her what's wrong, she tells me that she can't say it because it involves family, I understand and respect her privacy and don't go knocking on her door asking and pestering her to tell me!
Sudha: Thats true. There are limits to secrets.
Me: Yeah. Why can't she just understand and respect my privacy?
Sudha: I don't know?

The reason why I didn't want to tell her is confidential in order to not make things worst between us. But roughly, I didn't want to tell her because I didn't need anyone to spoil my day, especially not her. I was afraid that when I told her she would call me an emo because I get upset over little things like that. And that wouldn't help at all.

Now I am hurt because my best friend curse me to be a cursed pig of all things she could say to me. Why must she be so insensitive at all to her BFF's privacy?

Labels: disappointment, friends

aktf;
♥

Sunday, November 9, 2008

@ 11:00 PM

I don't know what's wrong with me today. I just feel so down and moody. I don't even have the apetite to eat. Somehow or another, I just feel like as if there's a hole in my heart. But whatever it is, I bet the hole was once filled by something huge, something that meant a lot to me. Something like the guy I loved. I wish I can just LET GO OF THIS FEELING! But well, I cried and I guess tears that have been shed can't be collected. So I'm leaving you with a malay poem I wrote myself about what I'm going through right now. Sorry to those whom do not understand Malay but umm, I guess I just can't learn how to express it in English.

Pernah kau kata kepada ku,
Bahawa kau cinta & sayangi aku.
Namun kini, kata-kata itu hapus,
Bagaikan habuk ditiup angin.

Aku faham bahawa kau mempunyai teman,
Ramai teman dan kebanyakannya peempuan.
Dahulu kala, aku yakin bahawa semua ini akan menjadi,
Tidak ku sangka teman kau menjadi penghalang.

Dahulu, bila saat ku berduka,
Aku tahu bahawa kau ada di sisi;
Mendengar rintihanku,
Dan meyakini aku bahawa kau akan selalu berada di sisi.

Namun kini, bila ku menangis,
Kau tiada di sisi.
Ku kehilangan,
kehilangan segala apa yang aku impi-impikan.

Kau berdiam diri,
Aku menangis dalam sepi.
Wahai kekasih ku ingin kau tahu,
Kau lah segalanya buatku.

Have a great Monday people.

aktf;
♥

@ 12:07 AM

Okay I know I've been leaving my blog to rot this past few days but seriously, blogging has lost some of its thrill. Really.

Well, hmm. Very random post since I'm damn bored and is thinking that I should blog before Nazira gets mad at me for not blogging and well, chop my head off.

So hmm, lets see. I can't wait till the PSLE results are out but I feel like stopping time so that I can spend more time wih my friends. I have like four more days of school before like we never see each other again. I shall make these last four days last in my memory. Haas.

But really nazira, we should meet up during the school holidays. But I'll miss my dearies a lot.

So hmm, Eckhart and Himesh have been online alot lately and well, it's just great talking to them. I mean isn't it just great having company around?

Yes I'm sure it is.

But hmm, I feel kinda sad because Haqym isn't talking to me. I don't know why. ):

I wish he would just talk.

Labels: conversations on IM, friends, love, random

aktf;
♥

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

@ 2:05 AM

So hmm, today we as in the whole class went to China Town for a Heritage Trail. It was fun because we kinda got lost along the way to Eu Yan Sang and Thian Hock Keng Temple. Well, I was the mapreader but the reason for being lost to the temple was because Iskandar tried to take over but he pointed us in the wrong direction!

Ah nevermind. The reason for being lost along theway to Eu Yan Sang was because the heat was taking over and I lost my sense of direction. Tsk. But I was a good map reader anyhoos. Haha. Perasan eh aku.

But anyway, I was damn hungry can?! OMG. Its like hell we walked like no one cared. I don't know how far we walked but it was leg aching. I sweated like nobody's business. I swear m whole back was wet.

On the contrarary, everyone's back was.

Oh I am so upset that Haqym is not talking to me. First Iskandar, now Haqym. I HATE MY LIFE CAN?!

Labels: disappointment, friends, funny stuff, love

aktf;
♥

Monday, November 3, 2008

@ 2:29 AM

So these past few days have been quite painful and confusing and chaotic.

Painful because my tummy hurts alot and because I have a huge ass ulcer in my mouth.

Confusing because...nevermind. Lets leave the reasons out shall we?

Chaotic because yesterday, we were planning to go to Chai Chee Seafood for our dinner but snce my grandmother cooked a huge pot full of lontong and no one came to eat it, we had to eat it for our dinner so in the end we had dinner at Aminah's Cafe. And also because of my ulcer, I had to eat my dinner up so slowly because it hurts. However so, this was what happened.

Aunty: Why are you eating so slowly?
Me: I have an ulcer in my mouth and it hurts a lot.
Grandmother: She has a what?
Mom: She has an ulcer in her mouth.
Grandfather: What?
Grandmother: She has banana crackers.
Brother: Huh? banana crackers?!
Mom: What?
Brother: Grandmother said that Sister has banana crackers.
Mom: No lah mother. ULCER!
Grandmother: Ohhh. Ulcer.

Haha. My grandmother is so cute.

I miss him omg. It has been the longest of time since I speaked to him. Oh god. Please make him go online or atleast reply my text messages!

Okay. Me talking to myelf shows that it is time for me to stop.

Okay dah bye.

Labels: dinner, famillial, family hang outs, jokes

aktf;
♥